Nostalgia critic reviews Teen Titans go!
by Smoking Wrecker
Summary: The Nostalgia Critic is reviewing Teen Titans go! This will be his biggest challenge in history
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first Nostalgia Critic story. I own nothing.**

The Critic is looking at his reviews on his computer and for some reason they all say Teen Titans go! "Teen Titans go!? What is that?" The Critic asked himself.

The Critic goes on the YouTube and finds some clips of Teen Titans go! he drops his jaws after seeing Robin crippling Kid Flash's legs, Beast Boy and Cyborg saying waffles over and over, Beast Boy being a hoarder, Raven watching a my little pony parody, the rip off Ducktales theme song, the Teenage Mutant ninja turtles, the video game references episodes, let's get serious, return of Slade, the fourth wall. But the worst two Black Friday and the episode where Darkseid is voiced by Weird Al.

"My god." The Critic was speechless after seeing this, he looked at the reviews for the story and sees that everybody hated it. Then his face turned from shocked to determination, he glares at the picture of Teen Titans go!

"I will bring this show to Justice. I will bring Warners Bros and DC's abomination back to hell where it belongs. For they have ruined a classic and you know what? I'm gonna start the review." said the Critic and exits the computer room.

 **I wanted to see Teen Titans go! get ripped apart by the Nostalgia Critic. But that's not gonna happen so I'm gonna do my own Nostalgia Critic review on this abomination. Please review and stay frosty**.


	2. Chapter 2

We see the Nostalgia Critic sitting on his chair. "Hello I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to." said the Critic.

We see a sideshow of the original Teen Titans series while the Critic does a voice over. "There was a show called Teen Titans and it awesome. The team were stereotypes but it was still good. I mean was leader of his own team. I never expected that. Even when they cancelled it after a cliffhanger. What the fuck?"

Then we see the Critic. "But in the year 2013 they brought back Teen Titans. Then butchered them in a bad show! This is Teen Titans go!" said the Critic..

Shows footage of Teen Titans go! "In case you were wondering the focus on what the Teen Titans are doing when they're not fighting crime. Sounds pretty boring right? Actually we were wrong with it's bad humor, plots that makes no sense and stereotypical characters. Basically the plot around the show has the Titans doing whatever the hell they're doing." said the Critic.

We now see the Critic with a disappointing look on his face. "But the cherry on top of this shit load of fuck is get this. The people behind this show never saw the original Teen Titans." said the Critic and than he got angry. "What the fuck is wrong with you people?! Did you hire anyone who never saw Teen Titans!?"

We now cut to a cutaway with Malcom and Tamara sitting around on their phones until the Critic walks in. "Hey have any of you guys seen Teen Titans?" Critic asked.

"I seen it." said Tamara.

"I haven't seen that." said Malcolm.

"You're hired!" said Critic pointing at Malcom with a shock Tamara watching.

"You think that's bad you should see the characters." said the Critic.

We now see footage of Teen Titans go! and focusing on the Titans. "Robin is a an asshole that wants things to go his way oh and a cheater. No really there's a episode where he cripples Kid Flash's legs. Some leader he is, right?" said the Critic. "If you guessed no you are correct."

"Basically Cyborg is now a retard and turned into the sidekick stereotype. The annoying kind. Along with Beast Boy. Raven is a emotionless person like Dakota Fanning." said the Critic and played the comedic drum solo.

"But get this they made her a my little pony fan. Goths shouldn't like cute things! And finally Starfire is basically the dumb blonde Nuff said."

We now get back to the Critic and looks on his phone. "Get this the original cast is doing the voices. They're basically killing their fame." said the Critic. "Let me just say that every episode they do stupid things. Like the first episode they have to find ingredients for a sandwich that gives them immortalaty. They must of gotten high on these episodes!"

Then we see a footage of the episode the mask where Robin removes his mask abd we see a small head in his eye. The Critic has his jaw wide open and then he got angry. "FUCK YOU!"

"Clearly you haven't read a comic. Robin wears a mask to protect his identity! Hell Peter Griffin and Quagmire did a better job! I need a break. We'll be right back." said the Critic.

 **I know it's not much but it's all I got. But I respect everyone's opinions on Teen Titans go! Please review and stay frosty.**


	3. Chapter 3

We cut back to the Critic with a look of disappointment. "I'm sorry about that I just needed a break from that. But let's get back to the review." said the Critic.

Announcer: Teen Titans go! Your new favourite show!

The Critic was confused from what just happened. "What?!"

Announcer: Teen Titans go! Your new favourite show!

"Are you kidding me?! They're saying that this really bad show is good?! No it's not the title should be this!" The Critic exclaimed.

"Teen Titans go! Your new hated show!" said Malcolm as the announcer.

"Yeah, they lied to us! But let's not talk about that. Let's talk the episodes." said the Critic.

Clips of Teen Titans go! are shown while the Critic does voice over. "There's a episode where boys are better than girls, an argument between burritos and burgers, the Titans ignoring Beast boy's birthday, Beast Boy and Cyborg saying waffles over and over."

The Critic bangs his fists on the table. "They call those episodes!? They look fanfiction one shots that a 5 year year old would write. Hell 5 year old kids would do a better job than this!" The Critic ranted. "But I have found 3 episodes where the creators have responded to critics and Teen Titans fans alike, by telling them fuck you!"

We see footage of let's get serious, the return of Slade, and the 4th wall while the Critic talks. "These episodes are nothing more than ratings traps so the creators can give us the middle finger and say fuck you. The writers act like trolls, they know the show is bad and they make us angry. The villain in Return of Slade was a clown, but they're telling us that you Nostalgia butthurts are losers or something. Let's get serious shows us what this show was like if it was serious with ugly rape faces. The 4th wall is the cherry on top of this shit load of fuck, because Control Freak rebooted Teen Titans into this and tells them that this show sucks." said the Critic.

M. Bison: Of course!

"But yet they're like. Yeah we suck deal with it you big crybabies!" said the Critic while a voice over. "Then they fart in Control Freak's face."

Then we see the Critic. "You know, for kids!" He replied. "Actually to be honest the fart jokes aren't the only thing in this show."

We see footage of Leg day, Robin flexing his muscles Smile bones and a scene where Beast Boy is laying on Raven's bed naked while porno music is playing. The Critic has a shocked and disgusted look on his face and spoke the words to describe this. "Fet-ish car-toon. I mean seriously what's wrong with these people? I mean do you think kids want to see that?! No this is wrong on so many levels!"

The Critic placed his hands on his face and rubbed his eyes. "I mean who's running the censors?" The Critic asked and we see footage of Beavis and Butthead laughing at the fetish stuff on Teen Titans go!

"You know what I can't take it anymore I need to end this review. And I hate to say but Teen Titans go! made me say this." said the Critic. "Batman and Robin is better than Teen Titans go!" The Critic breaks down into tears and cries.

We see footage of Teen Titans go! while the Critic does voice over. "The plots makes no sense, the characters are nothing more than toddlers, the jokes aren't funny, and the morals make no sense and told backwards. The question is why is this show still on? Well I heard that the creator of the show admitted that the show was stupid, because kids are stupid."

We see the Critic with a pissed off look on his face.

"Really? That's your answer? Kids aren't stupid, they do stupid things! You basically insulted your target audience, if I made a show that was stupid I would pull the plug right away. Cartoon Network you need to cancel this show, because you air it way too much keeping us away from Steven Universe and other great shows and nobody likes it! Do you not see the hate online or do you see it as praise?! Think about it! I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to." said the Critic and walks away.


End file.
